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by siywei

Blog#12 revise for eportfolio

December 10, 2018 in Writing

Besides revising the essay, I also need to start making my eportfolio. As for me, this is also very important. This is the record of my writing class. I value making my eportfolio very much. This is my first project in college that I can write in my profile after. As for eportfolio, our school resets a new eportfolio. We need to go to the library to attend a special eportfolio session. This is a lesson designed to give us a sense of how to make an eportfolio. Taking this class let me know how to make eportfolio, how to design the layout and add our essay to make it more convenient for readers to read. I designed the welcome page, so that readers can know my background before reading the article, and then the article will be easier for readers to understand. I’ve never done this type of grading in my writing class before, and I find it very novel. As a freshman, I am honored to be admitted into the class WRT102 which is the upper level writing class. I think it is a challenge for me. But I also accept the challenge. I spend a lot of time in the writing class, I hope I can pass the writing class and get good grades. During my revision of my composition, I met with many difficulties. Because my English level is not very good, still need to improve. I started at the edge of C, even below C, not enough to pass the lowest level of this course. I was very worried that my efforts in this semester were in vain. But after many revisions, my composition has improved a lot. So now I’ve got B or even B plus. Although this is not a very good result, it has been a breakthrough for me. This makes me understand that hard work pays off. I will still work on my rivise. We can make progress little by little. I hope I can get a good result and get recognition from teachers and readers. That’s what keeps me going.

by siywei

Blog#11 Research Paper revise

December 9, 2018 in Writing

After discussing with professor lucenko, I revised my research paper. I have never written such a essay before. This challenges not only my English, but also my ability to analyze the social issue. My research topic is poverty in the United States. I found a lot of materials. Such as peer-review articles and some news or newspaper. Poverty is a big social issue in America. The United States of America is one of The world’s most powerful nations, and is The third country in population, which equals to 326, 625, 791 inhabitants. My first draft had a lot of problems. The part of introduction has no connection with the following paragraphs, which will cause confusion to readers. A little bit out of context. Secondly, my analysis of the data is not accurate enough and there is not enough evidence to prove it. The last point is that I did not use cite resource properly when I cited. It makes my writing to let people feel confusing. After discussing with professor lucenko, I know what my shortcomings are and what needs to be modified. I need to link the introduction part with the following paragraph. The thesis proposed in the introduction part is analyzed step by step. Let readers understand and interpret the problem of poverty in the United States. Another problem is I’m not using the data accurately enough. Some of the things mentioned in other paragraphs go beyond the topic. In short, in the process of revision, I listened to the professor’s Suggestions and made modifications in the content and structure. I feel that my essay has changed a lot. It adds up. I’ve also looked at other resources to make a stronger case. Make the article more convincing. I think it is very important to analyze the article separately from the professor. This can help us improve our articles and have one-on-one time to understand our articles. This allows me to express what I want to express better, and also allows the professor to answer individual questions. My essay have changed a lot after talking with Professor Luncenko.

 

by siywei

#Blog10 Stasis Questions

November 6, 2018 in Writing

The United States of America is one of the world’s most powerful nations, and is the third country in population, which equals to 326 625 791 inhabitants. The Americans have built a real democratic society with the second world’s largest economy, “with a per capita GDP of $59, 500” (“The World Factbook”), which ranks world’s 19th in 2017. At the same time, the American nation has a lot of social problems as the world’s largest drug user. The country depresses in wages of poor citizens, increases in pension and medical expenses, and, also in investments of various projects aggravated the general economic situation. It causes such phenomena as budget deficits leading to poverty. Poverty is the most dangerous social problem all over the world irrespective of the economic and political development of the country. It needs special social programs for eliminating such a shameful social phenomenon lest the country should decay under social riots, terrorist attacks, or even armed conflicts.

    The definition of poverty is a state of deprivation, lacking the usual or socially acceptable amount of money or material possessions. The most common measure of poverty in the U.S. is the “poverty threshold” set by the U.S. government. Who are social groups influenced by poverty? They were racial and ethnic minorities, children, women, old folks, unemployed and disabled persons, and low educated and unskilled citizens. African Americans and Hispanics were the most suffered from poverty racial minority groups. poverty is associated with economic recession.In 2013, 20 percent of all low educated adults were unemployed compared to 6.5 percent of the unemployed with a bachelor’s and other degrees. The poor employable age persons were 29.8 percent of the total number of unemployed. 11.3 percent of the total population was disabled individuals, and 26.0 percent of them lived below the poverty line. In 2013, 4.2 million or 9.5 percent of aged persons lived in poor social conditions. If we don’t do anything. Poverty is going to get worse in America.

    One can eliminate it with the help of other countries. Special social programs on supporting children from single parent families to get a higher education, creating new working places in the South and joint ventures in Latin America, and naturalizing young immigrants can increase budget revenues eliminating low income social groups.

 

by siywei

Krause’s essay on developing a working thesis

November 6, 2018 in Writing

After reading Krause’s essay on developing a working thesis. The first point should be caught is readers. Who is my readers? My readers are teachers, peers, portfolio readers. Second, When I decided my topic. I should have my own opinions about this topic and I can find sources on computers, I can use library sources. I need to conform instructor’s requirement. Brainstorming to think about different ideas. Finding enough sources to support my topic. At last, I need to solve this problem.

by siywei

Pro-Con

November 6, 2018 in Writing

My topic is Poverty in the United States. The United States of America is one of the world’s most powerful nations, and is the third country in population, which equals to 326 625 791 inhabitants. The Americans have built a real democratic society with the second world’s largest economy, “with a per capita GDP of $59, 500” (“The World Factbook”), which ranks world’s 19th in 2017. The reason Why I choose this topic is that I saw many homeless on the street in the United States. Many of them are very talent. They sing and play instrument and other skills. So I want to learn more about this. Why there are many talent people are homeless. Why a very strong country has a big problem in poverty.

Poverty is linked to economic recession. When the economy recession, unemployment rises. Make many people poor. Kids don’t get good education. This is very important part about why poverty large shows in the United States.

Peer review article(Gabe, Thomas. Poverty in the United States: 2013. Congressional Research Service, 2015.  )support my topic about why poverty happened so fast. This is another article(https://talkpoverty.org/basics/). It shows the data about poverty. Different level and different race ‘s poverty data. 

The claim that challenges my argument is race. Race is not a problem cause poverty. Gabe, Thomas. Poverty in the United States: 2013. Congressional Research Service, 2015.  ) this peer review show how to solve this problem.

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Blog#9 topic of research paper.

November 5, 2018 in Writing

I have thought a lot about my research paper. This is the first time that I write this kind of essay. This is a new challenge for me in English. I was looking for many topics, such as poverty ,gun, immigration. Those are current America social issue. After I found some sources. I decided to choose poverty. Poverty is a big social issue in America. The United States of America is one of the world’s most powerful nations, and is the third country in population, which equals to 326 625 791 inhabitants. The Americans have built a real democratic society with the second world’s largest economy, “with a per capita GDP of $59, 500” (“The World Factbook”), which ranks world’s 19th in 2017. At the same time, the American nation has a lot of social problems as the world’s largest drug user. The country depresses in wages of poor citizens, increases in pension and medical expenses, and, also in investments of various projects aggravated the general economic situation. It causes such phenomena as budget deficits leading to poverty. Poverty is the most dangerous social problem all over the world irrespective of the economic and political development of the country. It needs special social programs for eliminating such a shameful social phenomenon lest the country should decay under social riots, terrorist attacks, or even armed conflicts.Poverty in the United States has become a real social disaster because almost 40 million people of various ages, ethnic origins, genders, and religions suffer from it. The American Government passed many social laws during the presidency of Barack Obama, but President Trump began restricting some of them. Moreover, he started a real war against South American immigrants, considering them the major social group undermined the American economy. Unfortunately, it will not improve the economic situation because poverty in America is a global economic phenomenon and one can eliminate it with the help of other countries. Therefore, special social programs on supporting children from single parent families to get a higher education, creating new working places in the South and joint ventures in Latin America, and naturalizing young immigrants can increase budget revenues eliminating low income social groups.

by siywei

Blog#8 Peer Review

October 26, 2018 in Writing

    Peer Review is a really helpful work for each other. It can help each other find their mistakes. At the same time. We also can learn from each other. In a shareable essay, though reading others’ essay. We can learn their ideas and some writing skills. It can help us improving ourselves and getting ideas. I haven’t do peer review before. This is a new discovery for me. I can learn from their essay to improve myself. As a non-native speaker,  grammar and punctuation are a big problem. But I can improve them during peer review. Until now, I did two peer reviews. I start feeling how peer review helps. When I do peer review for others, I feel this is a duty. I need to be responsible to others. Also, I can her/his personality though his/her essay. When I analysis the essay, I can find their different thinking and their writing skills. This is like “study”. We need to read many books to help us expanding our thinking.

  For my first peer review from other student. I got the feedback from he. He pointed out some my grammar and punctuation mistakes. The important part of this feedback is the text. I didn’t catch the main idea of that essay. I misunderstood the main point of this essay. So the whole essay should be rewrite. I think peer review did tell me what should I modified to improve this essay. In my first essay, I did two peer review from others. The second time is the professor. She told me where should I focus on and the main purpose of this essay. This is very helpful for me to rewrite my essay. I think peer review is way to find my mistakes and modify it. I revised my first essay more than three times. This is a prograss for me. Because I haven’t revise my essay more than three times. More exercise can improve myself become better. This is a very good work for people who is learning writing and want to improve themselves in writing. So I will keep doing this and keep improving myself.

 

by siywei

#Blog7 My experience about writing essay

October 16, 2018 in Blog, Uncategorized

      Rhetorical Analysis Essay is a big challenge for me to write. This is the first time for me to write analysis essay. And I don’t know how to write and I have no idea about it. I think the problem is I don’t know where should I focus on and how can I make for 1250 words. In the first rough draft, I used more than five hours to think what should I write. But I still got no idea. It might be difficult for Non-English Speaker. When I went to find professor go through my essay draft, I got some ideas that how can I write. This is a very tough work for me. After talking to the professor. I rewrote my essay. Rhetorical Analysis essay is focused on the way that writer’s writing skills and why the writer use this example to reflect the main idea. What is the writer’s purpose.

     I think writing is a very complex work. Different types of essays are different challenges. As for me, I need a lot of time to think how to start and what should I write. But the biggest problem for me, a Non-English Speakers is the grammar and punctuation. After I finished my essay I need to check many things. For the last profile essay, it is more easy for me to write. Because the essay is talking about myself, my experience. I just need to write my experience related to the person who I admired. At the beginning, I wrote large part about that person in rough draft. I didn’t know the point that the essay focus on. So I rewrite the whole essay. After many times revise, I think my essay become more great.

    As the time went by, I got improve my writing skill a lot and some writing strategies. In the future writing section. I still need to work on it harder and improve my English writing skills. Read more essay that can help me improve my writing skills and get more inspiration. Focus on details and attract readers attention and bring into my essay.

 

by siywei

#Blog 6 Learning English

October 9, 2018 in Writing

     I started learning English from the first grade of elementary school. The school has regular English courses and ESL courses. In English class, the teacher taught us the basic words and grammar. I used to remember a few words every day. However, in the ESL class, it was mainly to practice daily conversations. So I had the opportunity to communicate with foreign teachers. Foreign teachers would also teach us to sing English children’s songs. The learning process feels very interesting.

  When I was in middle school. The English course level is more difficult than during elementary school. It wasn’t just ” Hi. How are you!”. We need to use English to describe our daily life. What we do on weekend. What’s our goal about the future. The English teacher in China also started teaching us how to write a short essay. What is the topic of the article and how should we organized it. I needed to learn more vocabulary that could help to improves my essay level. I would also practice the ” Reading Understanding”. Because it could help me thinking and analyzing articles.

     I came to the United States in the last year of high school. This year has benefited me a lot. When everyone around me was speaking English. That helped me improve my speaking skill and grammar skill. When I listened more, I know how to use the words correctly. In the English class, I read a few books with my teacher and classmate. We would discussed the trend of the book story. What writing techniques does the author use? What is the purpose of author writing? What is the flashback in the article use for? Why the author give us this information? Brainstorm challenge. After I understand the ideas of those articles. I will make my essay more meaningful. In addition to this, debate and do presentation are the best way to improve my speaking.

     As I enter the college, this is another challenge for me to learn English deeply. But I believe I can master my English skill. And after four years, I hope my English level can be native speaker.

 

by siywei

Blog#5

September 30, 2018 in Writing

As I read “Welcome to Cancerland”. It talks about the writer Barbara Ehrenreich express her own personal battle against breast cancer. The writer starts her article with how her struggle against cancer. She  uses similes and comparisons to help create images in the reader’s mind which helps make her experience more relatable. She described the cancer cells as “suburban houses squeezed to a cul-de-sac”. It helps reader to understand how these cells look like. She through the breast cancer to make readers thinking, because she successfully defeated cancer.

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